How the SP-Studio Moderators saved Christmas

  • It was the night before Christmas and all throughout one house, not a creature was stirring not even a mouse. Damn Carbon Monoxide… anyway, as many families were spending some quality time together, the SP-Studio Moderators were secluded in their bedrooms, chronicling all the visitor wishes.



    Little did they know that up north, a big red guy was doing the same thing:



    However, as mile long lists proved inconvenient for Santa, in the late 90s he converted it to a digital system. But the thing with digital systems is they can be corrupted and no one was more corrupt than the penguinic hacker, based in the Antarctic: Professor Haxton Rockhopper:



    This malicious bird was a master of digital deceit. He was also a frequent foe of SP-Studio, creating the S.P.A.M.B.O.Ts, a weapon created to fund his technological research by spamming our beloved forum. But this holiday season he wasn’t planning on attack a fan site for an animated TV show. He wanted to take down Christmas.
    He launched his most potent attack on the Claus Co. server, leeching all the letters and most importantly, the clarification of who was Naughty and Nice.


    All while this was happening Santa was taking a break with a warm Latte (it was going to be a long night after all,) he came back to find his lists gone… and replaced with ads for Scottish furniture?
    Santa was shocked, he knew he was hacked and he needed his data back. He set his 3 I.T. elves, Bill, Steve and Clive on it.



    While he hurried his final preparations he got news back. The elves couldn’t find the hacker, they tracked his last attack, on a website called SP-Studio…


    After equipping his sports-sleigh with his fastest pilot: Rudy



    They soon arrived at the headquarters of The SP-Studio Moderators: The Hall of Justice.



    After Santa told the creator, Janina, of his predicament, she agreed to call in her finest team members:


    Jetpack-Guy: Team’s pilot and archer, also excellent salsa dancer



    Eggyslav: Team’s lead technical expert and swordsmith, also proud owner of William Shatner’s Toupee



    BellaXraven: Team’s marksmen and statistician, also available in Pumpkin-Spice flavour



    Jareen2: Team’s ballistics expert and navigator, you can find more about him on Grindr



    After arriving to the Hall of Justice via the use of the teleportation plot device, they soon realised it was the work of Rockhopper, they set their sights on Rockhopper’s base in Antarctica. As they landed they were attacked by swarms of Spambots, this time taking a physical form:



    They stormed the base and met with villainous Rockhopper, who told them his plan; to use the Naughty/Nice list to sell furniture to the world…


    Realising the evolutionary flaw of all penguins: fish. Santa pulled out a basket of herring from his sack, distracting the villain while the moderators saved Santa’s data. I’m sure the penguin was more of a threat online…


    They left the base to melt as they returned to the North Pole as Christmas was saved, and Santa gave the team parting gifts to thank the team for saving Christmas:



    A Rubber Duck for Jetpack-Guy
    An iPad for Jareen2
    A Red Ryder 200-shot carbine action range model air-rifle for BellaXraven
    And
    A Sausage for Eggyslav

    And all was saved (until that bloody penguin comes back…)


    The End.

  • I saved the Christmas and all I got is a sausage? Is it because I'm Polish?
    (It better be Podwawelska or Śląska....... :P )

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    Freude, schöner Götterfunken,
    Tochter aus Elysium!
    Wir betreten feuertrunken,
    Himmlische dein Heiligtum!
    Deine zauber binden wieder
    Was die Mode streng geteilt;
    Alle Menschen werden Brüder,
    Wo dein saftner Flügel weilt!

  • Quote from Eggyslav

    I saved the Christmas and all I got is a sausage? Is it because I'm Polish?
    (It better be Podwawelska or Śląska....... :P )


    It's a refer to The Simpsons:


    Quote from Kent Brockman

    There will be no firetruck for little Bart, no new sweater for little Lisa, and no Cajun sausage for little Homer